A Christmas Prince (2017)

Directed by: Alex Zamm

Written by: Karen Schaler & Nathan Atkins

When a reporter goes undercover as a tutor to get the inside scoop on a playboy prince, she gets tangled in some royal intrigue and ends up finding love - but will she be able to keep up her lie?

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This might feel like a radical change considering just last night I was watching a horror movie about torture, and now I'm watching a Holiday romance movie featuring a prince, I mean... That's just sappy and almost disgustingly sweet compared to what I watched last night... But it wasn't like "I have to see something cute now", it was more like, I have no school today and I'm bored, let's clear my list in Netflix.

I hate these kind of movies. I hate everything about them. The structure of the story is always similar, and you can see how the story is going to go from a mile away. It's an easy movie to watch, I guess there's nothing more to it. And yes, I admit, at one point I was almost excited to see how this was going to go, but that feeling lasted for two minutes, and that was that.

The only thing I liked in this movie is the actress Rose McIver, yet her performance wasn't as great as I had hoped. The only one giving this movie a little charm was Honor Kneafsey as princess Emily. Everyone else was just plain bland and awful.

So yeah, if you want an easy movie to watch over the holidays, this is perfect for that, but honestly... Nothing special about this movie. absolutely nothing. It's boring, bland, and I feel like I've seen it million times before. And I have no idea why Christmas even is a theme here, it could've been done without that.

☆☆☆

3 / 10

Skeleton Crew (2009)

Directed by: Tommi Lepola & Tero Molin

Written by: Tero Molin &  Teemu Molin

An asylum is being used by a film crew trying to film the movie "Silent Creek" based on murders that occurred in the 70's. The institution was shut down after Doctor Andersson "The Auteur" was caught making snuff films of himself torturing patients to death. It was believed that all the films were confiscated, yet the location where they were developed and screened was never found. While doing recordings, the crew find a hidden room. It contains the Doctor's undiscovered recordings, although the crew is disgusted by the snuff films, they decide not to call the police. The director of Silent Creek, becomes obsessed with Anderssons' films. He begins to act deranged, claiming their film is "not real enough".

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I actually wanted to see this movie so bad I straight up bought it. Didn't cost much, I bought it used, but still... I haven't really bought movies without seeing them in ages, except if they have my favourite actor in them and I can't find them in the rental store - that's what happened with The Legend of Barney Thomson, and other movies featuring Robert Carlyle.

This time, did I want to see this movie because of an actor? Well, if like 4 second role counts, yes, but mostly I just have been going through the IMDbs of my teachers to find anything interesting, and Skeleton Crew seemed like the most interesting movie there is to find. One of my teachers was a gaffer and a co-producer for this movie, and the plot seemed so awful it had to be at least entertaining, so I wanted to see this. And it feels weird saying this here since in July I did give the address to this blog to said teacher but I'm sure he only checked it out once, if even that, so I think I'm safe and he doesn't have to know one of the reasons I got this movie was to see his magnificent performance as a "snuff victim 3". By the way, it's weird seeing your teacher get murdered on screen. Anyway...

Skeleton Crew is definitely a weird movie. And I guess it's because I kept telling myself (and my friend) that this is going to be so bad, that I'm almost positively surprised. It was bad, but like with so many movies like this, it's kind of the point. If a movie like this would be made completely seriously and well, it wouldn't have any kind of charm, would just make you wonder if the writers are okay. When it's done with a tongue-in-cheek attitude, it's usually more entertaining.

Skeleton Crew plays with horror movie tropes in a fun, fourth wall breaking way, while being brutally violent and just... fucked up. It's been hours since I saw the movie, and I'm still confused about... well, everything.

It's a bad movie, but I definitely had fun when watching it. So if you do watch it, make sure you watch it friends, because this is one of those movies where it's just sad when you watch it alone and can't really laugh about it at the same time.

(Lighting was on spot, by the way, if my teacher does read this.)

☆☆☆☆

4 / 10 

Nurse 3-D (2013)

Directed by: Douglas Aarniokoski

Written by: Douglas Aarniokoski & David Loughery

By day, Abby Russell is a dedicated nurse, but by night, she lures cheating men to their brutal deaths and exposes them for who they really are.

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After a night of hard drinking it's good to relax with a movie full of blood, gore, sex and deranged nurses, right? A friend promised to borrow me this movie, so since she stayed over we decided to watch it and eat some pizza.

Since I saw the trailer it was clear that this movie is kind of a B-movie. Not so much when you look at the quality of cinematography, editing, stuff like that, but mostly because of the plot, the writing and the acting, which was weirdly porn-y and just uncomfortable, especially when it comes to Paz de la Huerta, who played the nurse Abby Russell.

The plot actually made me think about American Psycho 2, and how I've often said that movie would be way better if you just took away all the American Psycho references. Nurse is incredibly similar to American Psycho 2, but it's hard to say if it's a good thing. On the other hand there's blood and gore, more than in American Psycho 2, but the story doesn't seem as rich.

The movie was surprisingly colourful and looked really nice. Only problem is we didn't see it in 3D, which I guess is somewhat the point, so sometimes some effects look really tacky. Are they less or more tacky with 3D?

Nurse is an alright horror movie. There are so many things I'd like to change about it to make it even better, though. It has potential, but doesn't reach it. Still, fun to watch at least once.

☆☆☆☆☆

5 / 10

Seven Samurai (1954)

Directed by: Akira Kurosawa 

Written by: Akira Kurosawa, Shinobu Hashimoto & Hideo Oguni

A poor village hears a bandit clan is planning an attack, so they hire samurais to defend them.

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Let’s be honest here: this movie is excellent, but it was a wrong movie.

And by the wrong movie I mean our teacher made a mistake thinking it’s a good idea to make a class watch a movie that takes 3,5 hours. That’s way too long for us to sit on uncomfortable chairs, no matter how great the movie is. And it took us about 23 hours to finish that movie, since we had few breaks and a long lunch break and hey, we went home for a while and then returned the next morning... And I don’t think many of us were psyched about continuing the movie in the morning.

What made some of us even less psyched was that after we had finished the movie, our teacher went through it scene by scene telling us exactly why that scene is good and what’s important about that scene. And that took us about two days.

So instead of a three day long course about dramaturgy, it was a three day long course about Seven Samurais by Akira Kurosawa.

Even though I never want to see that movie again, mostly because of the past three days, I can’t deny this movie isn’t a masterpiece.

Watching this movie in 2017 is a whole different point of view to the movie than watching it like in the 1950s, 1960s... When I first watched it, I thought that the plot wasn’t anything special, it’s pretty typical. But as we discussed this with classmates, the thing is... This movie probably made that plot pretty typical, and it must’ve been something amazing when the movie first came out.

And as we went through the movie scene by scene, no matter how annoying that was at the time, there’s not a single useless thing about that plot. Of course it’s incredibly long and there are long scenes, but that can be a time thing or a place thing. But the story and the structure of the story is close to perfect, or at least to perfect as we know it, as we are used to thinking about the three act structure in plots.

And as an action movie on its own, Seven Samurais is amazing. It’s so emotional, which was a bit hard to grasp the first time, when I just wanted it to end and I wanted to go home. But after we viewed some scenes again, I actually understood them, and they actually hit me. And yes, some plot points are weird because of the cultural differences, but that doesn’t make them any less emotional. You might wonder why something happens, but it still hits you.

The biggest problem of the movie I can actually blame on the translator. The names of the characters were barely mentioned in the subtitles, so the first time watching it was really hard keeping a track of who is who. The first time the only ones I knew by name were Kikuchiyo and Shino. And since some of the scenes are so dark, it’s even harder to keep a track of who just died and who’s doing what, and when you don’t speak Japanese, you can’t trust your ears as much.

I absolutely adore this movie but also I kind of hate it because of the past three days. I hope to one day watch it and actually enjoy it, appreciate it properly. Right now I can just say, amazing movie, horrible experience.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

10 / 10

Alex & Emma (2003)

Directed by: Rob Reiner

Written by: Jeremy Leven

Alex has 30 days to write a novel and pay back his loan, so he hires a stenographer to help him.

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Alex & Emma was a completely new to me. I didn't know anything about it once I started watching, apart from the short little Netflix summary. I mostly started watching it because I adore Kate Hudson and I really wanted to see a romantic comedy.

Alex & Emma is a charming, silly little rom-com.  One of its biggest flaws, however, is that it doesn't really rely on the threat as much as it should. Hey, the main character will probably be killed if he doesn't finish the novel and hence get the money, and for some reason they aren't focusing on that at all. Maybe they thought it would be too heavy for a romantic comedy, but I think if they would've leaned on it more, it would've really given the movie that special something. And not necessarily make the movie feel like a thriller, but there is definite pressure in the situation, yet it doesn't seem or feel like that at all. 

One of the strongest elements in the movie is that there are two stories going at once: the reality with Alex and Emma, and the novel they are writing. It's always interesting to see movies that work out that way, especially when you can see how the two stories intertwine, like in the play in Moulin Rouge! or the screenplay they are writing in Seven Psychopaths - though Alex & Emma artistically is nowhere near those two movies. Also even though there are two stories, the story they are writing wouldn't work on its own. It would be boring without knowing how it's affected by Alex's experiences. Also the other story on its own is no story without the one they are writing.

There's something really charming and sweet about this movie, and a lot of its charm comes from the style of the novel they are working on. It takes place in the 20s and it looks and sounds exactly like movies based on that era would, which is noticeably different from the base, which is a typically bland romantic comedy.

Alex & Emma is fun and sweet, yet eventually there's not much in it. It's good to watch it once, but I can't imagine seeing it another time. What could it offer me the second time? No idea.

But at least it made me want to write a novel. Thank god NaNoWriMo is coming.

☆☆☆☆☆

5 / 10

Carrie (2013)

Directed by: Kimberly Peirce 

Screenplay by: Lawrence D. Cohen & Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa

Based on a novel by: Stephen King

A shy girl, outcasted by her peers and sheltered by her religious mother, unleashes telekinetic terror on her small town after being pushed too far at her senior prom.

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I went to see Carrie when it came out in the cinemas four years ago, and I thought I'd revisit it. Actually I was going to watch the 2002 version first but then realised how super bad it is, so decided to go with this one. I still haven't seen the original one, which is why I can't really compare this to the original one, I can only compare it to the novel. And I didn't like the novel.

First time seeing Carrie I loved it so much for some reason. But this is the third time and it's losing its charm. There's some really beautiful cinematography in the film, and some amazing lighting, but eventually the story doesn't really stand seeing it several times, or I've grown out of it in the past four years.

There's something kind of sweet about some parts of the story, and the rest is just really awful. That's a weird combination, because on the other hand it's this shy girl learning she has powers, but on the other hand there's a really disturbing abusive religious mother and all those students who are horrible to Carrie... I think especially now that I'm older I see better how sad the whole story is.

As a movie Carrie doesn't feel like anything great. It's a remake, and of course that affects it a lot. The story is well made, even though I didn't like the novel. The movie looks amazing, but something is off. Maybe I'll know better once I see the original.

☆☆☆☆☆

5 / 10